I never tell my child something is too “expensive”

Telling your children that you’re unable to afford something or that it is too expensive can contribute to a scarcity mindset. This can contribute to a fear of losing what they have, making them feel powerless over their wants & unable to influence their situation. And constantly hearing they “can’t afford” something can create a negative association with money, making them see it as a source of frustration rather than a tool and contribute to feelings of guilt for wanting something.

It also breeds materialism & constantly highlighting cost can make them fixate on price tags and the idea that happiness comes from possessions.

As they grow up, they might see other people’s success as a threat to their own, making it more difficult for them to be happy for others’ achievements. They may frequently compare themselves to others and focus on how they measure up. This can lead to feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem, and can lead them to be overly cautious and unwilling to take risks as they get older.

Focus instead on what they can do and how they can earn it. Chances are if it wasn’t that important to them they’ll forget about it or by having them work for what they want will help reduce entitlement, lay the groundwork for delayed gratification, teach decision-making, financial responsibility, & foster a sense of accomplishment.

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Xo,
Dr. C