How to respond to someone that is always bragging

Remember - Bragging is different from sharing good news.

-Ignore it.
Bragging is different from sharing good news (i.e., I just got a new car, job, married, engaged, passed a test). When someone shares good news they want the other person to be happy with them to share genuine happiness. When someone brags they are seeking validation - admiration, praise, and to trigger jealousy within you (and this is a compulsion to cover up their insecurity) or they are trying to dominate socially.

Remember, a lion doesn’t have to tell you it’s a lion. Someone that is truly exceptional will have their achievements recognized without excessive self-promotion, they don’t need to constantly remind others of their accomplishments.

So ignore them. This won’t change their personality overnight but they’ll be less likely to brag to you.

-Say: “You must be proud”, then redirect the conversation.
This response allows you to acknowledge them without them needing to boast further. Redirecting the conversation allows you to subtly set a boundary & indicate that you’re not interested in hearing more. This also avoids a direct confrontation, which can be helpful in maintaining a positive relationship.

-What are you trying to convey?
If this person is worth your time then try this response so you don’t harbor resentment or frustration towards them. It’s non-accusatory & avoids directly accusing the person of bragging, as it focuses on their intention rather than their behavior. It’s open-ended so that invites the other person to reflect and elaborate on their thoughts which can encourage a more productive conversation. It’s respectful and you’re creating a space for open communication, which is needed to build stronger relationships and resolve conflicts.

Need more help navigating difficult relationships or want to work on being more assertive? Book a 1:1 with me by heading to the book a session tab above.

Xo,
Dr. C