This tip will save your relationship or marriage!
Relationships are like cars.
When they’re brand new, everything’s perfect. They drive well and they even have that new-car smell. Over time, you start seeing wear & need to get your car serviced because if you don’t, it’ll break down. Normallly, these “services” come after certain time periods, or after something happened with the car. The same sort of “services” can be and should be applied for relationships.
When it’s brand new, it’s all butterflies. You’re experiencing each other, and many things are firsts - many new things are happening. Over time, if you ignore and neglect things that bother you or are important to you, it’s just going to lead to resentment or both of you drifting apart.
So apply the same premise to your relationship and either have weekly, monthly, or quarterly check-ins, or “services”, or after something has happened that warrants the check-in. However, equally important is to do so when you’re both in good moods and aren’t busy. Don’t do it the second aftter something bothered you. Take time to calm down, and articulate properly what it is that you didn’t like.
If you can have periodic check-ins and open communication regarding things when you’re both in good moods, you’ll be able to make it through anything and catch any issues before the become much bigger.
xo,
Dr. C