3 phrases to use when you’re not invited…

3 phrases to use when you’re not invited…

-Smile, Say nothing & redirect/excuse yourself. You weren’t supposed to be there & go make better plans at the same time.

Finding out you didn’t get invited to something your friends did can sting and feeling excluded is one of the worst feelings. Instead, smile  and say nothing then redirect the conversation or excuse yourself. You maintain composure and it allows you to control your reaction and avoid negativity. It also avoids drama. By making other plans, you take back control and don’t allow yourself to be a victim.

-Some of my friends told me about the (name of event) they’re going to, I’d love to go if there’s space.

This response tells the host you’re part of an inner circle that was invited to the event. It’s respectful and non-demanding and it allows the host to consider the situation (e.g., space limitations, budget) before responding.

-Heard about the event you’re having, I’d love to come to support you.

It focuses on wanting to support the host, which is a friendly and positive way to approach the situation. it expresses your interest in being there without seeming pushy. It subtly leaves the door open for the host to consider extending an invitation.

Please note that when it comes to work and new friends, sometimes you’re going to need to put yourself out there to get invited. My motto is try 3 times with someone. If they say no or don’t include you after 3 times then move on.

Also before you get mad: ask yourself, could I have done something to upset, annoy, or offend them? Have an honest conversation with yourself before playing the victim.

Need more help with communication or relationship skills? Book a 1:1 with me by heading to the Book a session tab above.

Xo,
Dr. C